Episode #017 Seven Simple Ways Parents and Caregivers Can Help Kids Build Vocal Confidence

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[00:00:00] Welcome back. As we are rapidly approaching the end of summer. Oh, my goodness. Today's topic, Simple Ways Parents and Caregivers Can Help Kids Build Vocal Confidence. So this is a really big deal right now. Even locally, all of the articles are coming out the news articles. They're bringing specialists in child psychologists and all the different ways that we can prepare our kids, especially school age, the younger grades, but even, our older kids, high school college level, there is so much well, mental health.

Mental health continues to be a huge topic positive mental health tools and what we can do for our own personal mental health, how to support that. And friends, I am here to tell you, singing, now it's not just because I do [00:01:00] this for a living, it's not just because I am passionate about what I do with the voice, but my experience is showing me over and over the quickest way to change your mental state.

is to sing. The quickest way to change your physical state is to do something vocally with your voice. Singing, vocal exercises, breathing, all of the things connected to this apparatus here we call the voice, which is not something that's just happening in your throat. or your mouth with your teeth, your gums, your lips, all of that business.

It is an all embodying, all encompassing, and I'm really excited because I have podcast content all the way through October at this point coming your way. So keep tuning in, keep sharing this information with people that you know and love and care about. And I am going to be focusing and putting an emphasis on the positive effects.

to mental [00:02:00] health. But today is really about preparing our kids no matter what age they are to go back to school. There can be so many things around that, the unknowns, a new school year, new classrooms, new teachers, new way of doing things. And there are things we can do right now to support our kids and just getting their head wrapped around.

all of the unknowns, right? And even as adults, I still don't like unknown. I've gotten a little bit better. I don't have to plan every single solitary thing out. And I'm, I've learned how to, even with my plan, how to detach from outcomes at the end of the day and trust. That things work out exactly the way they're supposed to at the perfect time with the perfect people.

So, for today our quote, I'm loving my quotables, today's quote is by George, George Weinberg. I don't know who [00:03:00] he is, I just found the quote, but I love the quote because it really has to do with our young people. The quote is, Hope never abandons you. You abandon it. And if our future, our kids, those that we're investing in today for our tomorrow aren't our first priority, I mean, we need to be our first priority first, right?

It's like that. I was gonna say the gas mask, no gas mask, but the air mass coming down in the airplane, we need to make sure that we are breathing first. in order that to be of service to those that we love and care about, especially our kids. So with that amazing parents, grandparents, caregivers, are you ready to unleash your child's vocal superpowers?

I'm here to help you do just that. Building vocal confidence in our kids is not only fun, but also an essential skill [00:04:00] that can set them up for success in so many areas of life. So I want to dive in, and I'm going to help you discover some really simple, exciting ways to turn your little ones into vocal rock stars.

So there are, I think there are seven items here. Yes! seven ways, seven simple ways to encourage our kids. We are going to talk about singing just because we can sing. I'm going to talk about fun karaoke adventures. You can do right there in your home, creating a confidence boosting playlist, super fun praise and encouragement.

Always enrolling in a kid friendly singing class. Turning storytelling into vocal playtime and maybe even performing together as a family band. So there are a couple of things before I jump into each of these. I just, I want to address a [00:05:00] neighbor of mine was sharing. She has three granddaughters that she has a couple of days a week.

They, when they're not in camp, they're with her, they're doing Grammy camp. And she was sharing how. Her, the two of the girls, I want to say they're like seven and ten years old. So they're old enough to know, they're, they're aware. Anyway, they had wanted to do this fun thing with daddy. They wanted to give him a mani pedi and they wanted to do like a spa day.

for dad. And what grandma was sharing with me is that, they had his feet in the water and they're, they're doing his fingers or whatever they were, they were doing. He was on his phone the whole time. So dad is seeing this as, yeah, sure, girls, let's do the, keep them occupied. But what they were really wanting was engagement with dad.

And What came out in the conversation with the grandmother is how angry they were and they were frustrated and dad wasn't participating. He wasn't engaging. He [00:06:00] wasn't playing with their spa day here. The little girls are giving daddy this beautiful gift, but dad's playing games on his phone instead, because that's what dad does for himself to relax.

So parents, caregivers, I know, I know it's hard. We've got those brain games keeping us young, keeping us agile. I can't say enough and and I certainly was no expert at it. And you all know now my kids are, they're all flying on their own. And now it kind of in hindsight, whenever they are around when I get a moment, if it is just a moment, I I now actually will drop everything because there's nothing more important than getting that few minutes or half hour or whatever I get with my kids.

I wish I had done more of that. I wasn't necessarily the parent that was engaged in doing other activities, but I was very busy getting ready for the next thing that they needed to be at, making sure that the lunches are made, making sure we've got water and snacks to go from school to the practice [00:07:00] to the whatever.

And of course, running my business. All at the same time. So I just, I want to just encourage you if you're a parent or a caregiver, it doesn't take a lot of time. Our kids, but they know, they know when we're there, when we're present and when we're not. And, and I'm going to talk more about that in a minute.

So listen, the first one here, are you ready to help your kids soar to new heights of vocal greatness? Let's bring this back to what we can do to help them. I've got some fantastic strategies for you today. This first one is called Transcribed The just sing, sing just because so I think the first thing that we need to get over and I, I've heard this, I've heard parents say, or grandparents, my kids, my grandkids, they have a lot to say when I open my mouth and start to sing.

So please let it be about your kids. And don't, don't let their comments or their feedback about your voice [00:08:00] destroy that moment that you have with them, all right? Keep the focus on them, keep the focus on being playful, and here's a practical way to do it. Super simple, really quick. Find a cozy spot, put on some feel good music, and just let them belt out some of their favorite songs.

It's not about hitting the right notes, it's not about expressing themselves. It is about expressing themselves freely and building that precious vocal confidence. So, the first piece of that is what are they listening to? And we have a lot of, kids that the Disney, all of the songs from the Pixar and all of the animated shows out there there is the kids bop, which are very popular.

I think they're still popular where they take current, like very current and they make it a family friendly. If there's. Any illicit lyrics in there. And so what are your kids already listening to? Turn that on and just let them play. And it is not about [00:09:00] perfect pitch. It's not about them being in tune.

They need no feedback. Let me, let me speak to feedback just for a moment. I have had adults come into the studio to work with me, adults that have not sang since they were children. I'm talking seven years old, 10 years old, where they were part of a choir or a, a well meaning family member or a sibling, or somebody gave them negative feedback about their voice.

What does that tell that child? You're off tune, you're off timing, you're, that tells them they're not good enough, they shouldn't be doing this don't, literally, I had a client, I don't know, I, I, they may listen to these, I'm not mentioning any names, who I believe she was in second grade, seven years old, maybe Catholic school, Where the nuns asked her to please [00:10:00] just turn the page for the piano player.

Your job is to just turn the pages. You don't need to sing. That woman came to me 50 years later just to learn, to see, to find out if that feedback she had received as a child was true. Of course, in one session, 30 minutes in, I'm showing her. She does have a voice. She's got great pitch. She's got wonderful timing.

She's an athlete. That feedback goes so deep. I've had adults who were asked to lip sync. In the kids winter saying, people that do that, I have no words and I'm not going to go there today other than I have Kleenex in my studio for these reasons, people coming that don't believe they've told they can't, they shouldn't, you won't ever, and then they come and see me and they, they're still holding on to those old stories.

So the greatest thing you can [00:11:00] do for your kids to prepare them for their own vocal confidence. It's just give them, present a safe space for them to play because it really is just about play. All right. Keep the focus on them. Keep the focus on the play. Keep your, your well meaning feedback to yourselves.

Because you, we can so easily, so quickly stunt the growth of that child where they'll never sing another note until they meet someone like me later in their life when they're, adults, full grown adults. Second thing you can do, parents, caregivers, turn your living room into a karaoke place.

Karaoke adventures at home are the bomb diggity way to let your kids shine while having a blast. Again, choose songs that match their interest. Don't forget to join in the fun. Singing together brings a wave of joy and helps boost their self assurance. Plus you'll get some hilarious family moments out of it while [00:12:00] boosting.

immunity, positive mental health. It's a chance for you to play, to connect, to engage. It's that cute. You've heard me talking about karaoke club. All of those are here in the area. Second Tuesday every month with, rain or shine, we are on at 7 p. m. The second Tuesday of every month. If you're here in the Santa Barbara area, we're meeting up at the Uptown Lounge and That karaoke club is really starting to evolve into something super fun.

I had no idea. I'd always been a karaoke goer myself but what's ha this is different. Shout out to Joey Ochoa. Love you, bro. This started out as a way just to support him as the karaoke host, to build some engagement, to build some, some foot traffic into the venue, and it's really blossoming into something I actually am really looking forward to.

And it's not Just for the karaoke anymore. It's the community that we're building there right now. I have current clients, past [00:13:00] clients. You don't have to be a client at all. It's a safe place. It's a fun place. And these are adults. These aren't even kids. But what we're building there is really fun. So if you're catching this and you're local, please mark your calendar and join us the next time that we meet.

The third thing that you can do as an adult as a caregiver to boost your child's confidence is their own playlist, right? Get creative. Let them put together the playlist. I'm big on playlists. I'll talk more about that in a second, but let them compile into a special playlist. Again, I mentioned a Disney classics, the pop chart toppers kids bop now is another one and O.

W. And let them have their own curated collection that will help them feel like true vocal superheroes. The I love playlists. Playlists are my go to when I am building anything. If I'm getting ready to produce a show, if I [00:14:00] am working with my clients to help them decide which songs, are a go, which might be Push a pin until they've got a little more skill behind them.

Whenever we do finalize the, the show list, the song list for a show, I have that in order. And that is literally how I study. I study with my own playlist and that's why I'm really listening to the original artists and what they were doing. And how we can make those songs our own, how we can tweak them a little bit, but it's really empowering for a child to be able to curate their own list.

Now, how to do that? Apple pay, I'm, I'm Apple play, not Apple pay, Apple play. I love Spotify. I have a family, I pay, I don't know, 13 bucks a month. The whole family gets to use it. I can put songs in order and the free. I don't think you can put them in a specific order, so that's also another way I listen to the show.

I listen to how it, how it builds [00:15:00] energetically, that big crescendo, where we're gonna, we're gonna slow the tempo down a little bit, where we're gonna pick it up. Real strong beginnings, real strong endings. You don't have to go that far with your kids, but that's how I actually use Playlist to prepare for my own events.

Fourth thing you can do, superstar parents, remember to shower your kids if you are going to give them feedback. of any kind. Shower them with praise and encouragement every step of the way. All right, when they conquer high notes or they take center stage at the family karaoke night, let them know how incredibly proud of them that you are.

And I, I do have a lot of a lot, a number of young clients that are plugged into the theater programs or they just want. confidence to audition for the next school play. They, when, when those people are coming to me for that, it is really for the [00:16:00] purpose to get them ready for an audition. And I like my audition process.

I like how I get them ready. I give them the same content that I would an adult. Wanting to maybe audition for, one of the reality shows, the American Idol, the Voice, America's Got Talent, to the hobbyist who just wants to audition for the local adult theater in the area. The content is the same.

That level of professionalism when I'm helping even a young person prepare. I've got one gal right now off the chart. She is. Auditioning for an organization here. Lights up. Shout out, Amy Love. Mwah. This young woman the audition, she has to do a monologue, 60 seconds or less. And she has to also sing a song.

I let her pick the song. This, this, I don't do that very often. I'm usually making suggestions, but she [00:17:00] has a nice enough library going right now. Her song choice was spot on. Now this is someone in junior high. But she's been with me for a little while. The song does exactly what any song should do if you're a singer, and that is showcase your entire vocal range from those lows to those highs, that two and a half, three octave range that she has it, she plays with crescendo getting really big and dramatic and then coming back out of that she does some stylistic things that are very unique to her voice.

That, that was. A little bit easier. The monologue, once she got going, she's playing with comedy. This is a first for her and what has emerged with this audition piece is so beautiful. So believable. She's. Her monologue is she is a retail gal trying to sell something to a customer and her mannerisms [00:18:00] and how she uses her voice and her hands, her facial expressions.

She is beyond her ears. She's going to hit it out of the ballpark. Now, I'm not saying you need to do that with your kiddos to get them ready for school around vocal confidence. But if they are auditioning for something, if this is the next step for your child that is something I actually can do a full evaluation.

That one hour thing at the end of your podcast, your show notes from curious to confident, if you have a child that is moving into that space where you just need an evaluation of, what's going on with my kid, can they, I guess they don't need to hear feedback, constructive feedback from you.

The parent, the guardian, if you are wanting them to meet and get professional feedback. You want to send them to someone like myself, or if you have a voice coach or a singing teacher that you like or prefer wherever you're, you're living or wherever you're hearing [00:19:00] this, this podcast please take them to a professional to get the constructive feedback because then there's no connection to anything constructive coming from you, the parent, the caregiver, the grandparent.

So that's not going to mess It's not going to get into any gray area in, in your support and encouraging them. There's not going to be any weird thing going on in there. Take them to the professional and I've got that link that you can go click and schedule an appointment. If you just want feedback about, can your kid hear the notes?

Are they on key? Do they have timing? I can help you do that. So you, you send them to me, but you don't need to do that. Positive reinforcement goes a long way in building your child's vocal confidence and making them feel unstoppable. If you bring them to me for a session, they're not just walking out of that session unstoppable.

They're like, where do I sign up to go use my voice? Right? So the fifth thing you can do, if you have a [00:20:00] young diva or rock star in the making, it's time to consider a kid friendly singing class. Joining a supportive and nurturing group of young singers can do wonders for your child's vocal skills and confidence.

They gain new friends, they learn from talented instructors, and they shine like the true stars they are. So I already mentioned a little bit about Amy, who I absolutely love and adore. We go back, my goodness, our kids were in, they were in preschool together. Star King Preschool where music and creativity, in fact, shout out to that whole organization.

It was a co op where The children really were these little baby kids really were running the show like we were not supposed to we were trained we were taught as parents and caregivers, not to show them how to do it, let them figure it out on their own, because I tell you, and I know some of you [00:21:00] listening who have kids or you've been around kids.

Sometimes they figure out a much better way. Then what we might have even suggested. So huge shout out to all the coops. We have a number of them in this area, and I learned so much from them in participating. I have lifelong friendships that came out of there. The parents of other children, parents that I would not have reached out to hang out and spend time with.

But because our Children, Gravitated to each other. Our Children were friends that kind of opened up those doors for those friendships for us as parents. So, I personally don't have anything ongoing. I just don't have a lot enough kids to do an ongoing group class, but there are a number of them in our area wherever you live.

If you're out of our area, go check out what kids programs you've got going on now. I do want to say Something about that as well. There are a lot of great kids programs out there. Just an aside, as [00:22:00] a parent or a guardian, before you sign your child up for that, that group program, go and look at the testimonials of other happy parents.

Go sit in on a class. Maybe your child, if they're, if they offer a complimentary class to go check it out. I, I'm just saying this as a precursor. Just as there are really great, amazing, encouraging, supportive teachers. I am really sad to say that there are some really, I'm trying to choose my words. There are not very nice and supportive teachers out there.

And there are nothing bad on the program, but the instruction, where the teacher has taken it to a level that just doesn't feel right. And I've [00:23:00] had, I've been the receiver. I've, I've received the kids that have been in those programs. That they're going along their way, they're having a blast, they're doing this amazing thing they love and they get a teacher in there who's yelling, who's speaking down to them, that, I mean, there are things, I've, I've had clients, young clients, kids, share with me how they've been treated in these programs that are not cheap, that the parents paid a lot of money, my own, one of my own children included, that I have no idea what's going on in these people's heads.

I just, it blows my mind. So my encouragement there before you go drop a whole bunch of money in a program for your kid, go check that program out and specifically who's going to be teaching your kid and you'll know you will instantly know Whether that personality is going to work with your child or not, [00:24:00] and that's all I'm saying.

That's all I'm going to say about that. The sixth thing that you can do, story time, play time. Again, it's all about play. It's just about supporting your kid, having a good time, them having a good time, and Turning your bedtime stories, if you are big on bedtime stories and reading, into a vocal adventure by reading your stories with different character voices and inflections.

Encourage your little ones to join in and add their unique twist to the story. This playful practice not only nurtures their imagination, but also builds their vocal prowess in a fun and engaging way. Now, a real simple way to do that, friends. You've heard me speak before on the five elements, earth, air, fire, water and metal.

So a fun way to do character voices, which I do with my clients. We've done this with songs. We've done this with readings. We've done this with content that clients have to present [00:25:00] to their organizations or other people. So you go in and play with, you might have heard in the recent podcast, we played with the Marilyn Monroe, that real breathy, airy thing.

And then, when they entered the next door, All of the sudden, the lion came at them, and they had no place to go, where were they gonna go? Oh, but there's a stream right through the nether door. They could jump in that water and float along in the stream. So I've just thrown at you, Three different elements, tonal qualities or sound in my voice.

The first one was very breathy and airy. Then they went through the door into the fire of the lion and the next door led them into the creek or the river flowing like water around the rocks. So fun, have fun with it. Be creative. There's no right or wrong. Your kid isn't going to flip out and [00:26:00] tell you that you're doing the wrong way.

Well, maybe they might. I had one of those. You're not doing it right, mom. So anyway, number seven, last but not least, it's family band time. So you can gather your family, your kids, your loved ones, for a musical extravaganza. Now, when you do this, let them pick their instrument or lend their voice to the band performing together as a family not only creates cherished memories, but also boost your child's confidence as they see the joy their voice brings to others.

So, family stories the, your grandparents if, if. They haven't been around the grandparents, learn stories and get content from that area, parents, your kids in my own family. So. And just on instruments for a second, a real simple thing you can do, you don't have to actually have any instruments.

You already have instruments built in to your [00:27:00] body. Hands, your hands for clapping, your fingers for snapping. Pots and pans. I've got pictures of my, my oldest, he's wearing, the bowl on the head with the pots and pans and the wooden spoon. Boxes make great drums and percussion instruments.

You do not have to have any real instruments. Now let's say that you do, keyboards, you can pick up really inexpensive. Oh my goodness. You have the, not even a full keyboard online, Amazon. Instrumental music. You pick these things up really inexpensive Craigslist, Facebook marketplace. Go stock up.

Go see what instruments are available there. Guitars, bells. I love bells. Shakers. Super easy. You pick those up for a couple of dollars so you don't have to spend a lot of money or have a bunch of instruments. My background. My birth father was very musical. I didn't ever spent a lot of time with him. I didn't reengage or really meet him [00:28:00] till way later in my life.

I had always had this music thing, but you know, the funny story in high school, when I auditioned for the jazz choir, I did not make it into the jazz choir. And I thought I had more musical background, but my little sister made it into the jazz choir. She was the, the brain nerd, in the books all the time.

So, fast forward that, I picked up, piano, some guitar lessons. I did a lot of things along the way. Now, when I became a parent myself, I was singing, I had my practice. I, my oldest. I had just started singing and I was taking lessons myself. I would bring him to my lessons. He'd sit in the corner with his crayons and his dinosaurs.

And so he was absorbing everything I was doing while I was doing it and has gone on to become a songwriter and an artist and produce music himself. Now, my other two were. [00:29:00] I carried them all the way up to their delivery dates. So they were with me in my sessions, teaching vocal coaching, singing. for for over 40 weeks, both of them.

Now, they never really expressed any interest in music. They were athletes until recently as young adults. And now they've both picked up music and they're playing and doing their own thing with it. So, it's, it's just exposure, right? Just giving them the opportunity, prepare. You don't have to prepare anything.

Just be, just play, just have fun and model it for yourself, right? Do it for yourself. They see you doing it, but you don't even have to go that far. Take the Star King method and go back and ask them what they want to do with it. Let them, there's no, no right or wrong, right? There's no good or bad. There is just.

Just do it. Just be just have a good time. So [00:30:00] there's a lot more on there, but I need to wrap this up because I'm at my time limit. So parents, caregivers, it is time to rock the world of vocal confidence with your awesome little kiddos. Embrace these simple, fun, effective strategies to help your kids soar to new heights.

Remember, a confident voice opens up endless possibilities. Let's cheer them on every step of the way. You've got this. Your kids will thank you for the gift of vocal confidence that lasts a lifetime. So as you enter this incredible vocal journey together with your kids, watch them shine like the true vocal superstars that they are.

Before I sign off. If you've gotten any value out of this podcast, I'd love for you to share it with someone you love, someone you care about, someone who could benefit. I'd love a five star review if you think it was worth that. If you are watching on YouTube, I would love for you to subscribe. You can keep, keep up on what's [00:31:00] coming next.

Like I said, I have got content all the way through October. I'm gonna be covering a lot of mental health. How your voice contributes to that. We're going to be bringing that into your business. If you're listening as a business owner, if you are a a teacher, a doctor, a healer, a creative, so much more fun stuff on the way.

And as I mentioned earlier, if you are interested in booking a session either for yourself or for your young one,

I'm going to preface that, that initial evaluation, like, when they're really young, preschool age still, fours and fives, they, they don't need any formal vocal training. It's, it's, they're still a little bit young, they're still a little bit kind of all over the place. But if you have a child that is in elementary school, up, on up please.

Click in the link below and pick up a session, go book an initial diagnostic is a full [00:32:00] evaluation where I break everything down for your child. I show them what they have in place already. We plot their range. We create a vocal workout, specific and unique. to their voice. If they are preparing and they need to audition for something they would bring their material to that session and I show them how to approach it, how to deliver it.

So there's a lot that goes on in that session. And then finally, if you are not part of the karaoke club yet in this area here, please join us on the second Tuesday of every month. I hope to see you there. And in the meantime, always remember, keep breathing, inhale confidence. Exhale any doubt that you have and keep this party going by just having a good time.

Thanks so much for tuning in. I will see you next time.